Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Singapore Sling -1

For the last few days, I have been in Singapore. Although cooped up in a beautiful seaside resort for the most time, I had an opportunity to explore the city (to call it a country seems somewhat incongruous, given that it would roughly be of the same size as Delhi) over last weekend. My overall impressions about the place:
The positives:
1. It’s a nice and friendly place. Populated mostly by Asians (and people of South Indian origin), it almost feels like home.
2. It is a very clean and well organized city. There are free bus services on some routes, spic and span public places, taxes on road usage according to peak hour traffic, greenery, awesome infrastructure and the works.
3. It tries hard to be an interesting place – with shopping plazas, multiple pubs, great food joints, a night safari, underwater aquaria, cable cars, cruises along the sea and other attractions that would make a tourist feel engaged.
4. A huge airport that is very efficient and easy to navigate.

The negatives:
1. There is a weird haze over Singapore these days (the kind you would find over Delhi on winter evenings in the pre-CNG days) due to some forest fires burning in the Indonesian island of Sumatra. The news and newspapers are full of dire predictions about how terrible it is for people’s health.
2. The newspapers are all very juvenile and seem to be written by earnest 14 year olds, carrying such weighty articles as ‘Is Singapore losing its culture?’ or ‘Why do women care so much about their weight?’ or ‘Are Singapore malls displaying too many expensive clothes in stores?’ on front pages.
3. The city overall seems mechanical (for want of a better word!!). There seems to be too much planning, too much structure, too much organization. One longs for some good old Indian-style commotion and hullabaloo.

All in all, I think it is understandable why so many Indians make Singapore their home. It offers the closest you can get to an Indian life with western public systems.
But I can never live in Singapore for long. For the sole reason that there is no chewing gum allowed here!!! Not sold in shops, nor allowed to be carried into the country. Gives me the shudders. I am beginning to hyper-ventilate as I think of a chewing-gum-less fortnight ahead in Singapore.

9 comments:

bluesky said...

I had a similar reaction - very disciplined and orderly, almost boring. How many malls can you visit?

Been to Clark Quay yet?

Anonymous said...

Try and go to one of the plays/concerts at Esplanade in the evening.. it was quite an experience for me ! I personally love the stretch by the river outside esplanade where you can simply take a leisurely stroll or sit .. wish we had become friendly at sentosa last year.. would have saved me quite a bit of trouble ;)

Me

Anonymous said...

I love the bandra hullabaloo :)

Me

Anonymous said...

Singapore may be mechanical (ur euphemism for organized I suppose) and therefore boring (and by that qualification of urs so would the US!!!) but some quick advantages I can c of being in a place like Singapore are
1) Likelihood of crime being punished – be it eve teasing or rape, certainly crime rates are lower. Unlike India where even Rapists and Murderers (remember Jessica Lal?) go scott free
2) if someone bangs into your car the police is just around to help out. In India, people have made it a habit that if they bang into someone else’s car a) they either run away b) they argue with u that is UR fault c) if they agree that it is their fault, they never pay up (unless ur a burley brusque man who can man-handle the driver at fault and literally bully him into paying)
3) u have organized crèches where u can put ur kids without fear that when ur at work, the wicked Indian aayaah may have ur infant at her mercy. And of course, never mind how unclean the aayaah may be.
4) u don’t have pressure of grades at school and therefore, u can freely learn what u like and hence, enjoy childhood better. U don’t need to come back with truckloads of homework like in India and spend ur time (and waste ur parents time as well) on just that.
5) ur educational qualifications are well recognized (dosnt’ matter even if ur from some rotten bottom 30 school in the US, that will still be considered 10^9 times better than ur top Indian B-school “IIM”. People will ask u “an IIM a what?”)
I am sure I can pen down more advantages of living in a “mechanical, planned, organized” place like Singapore. But I am sure u get the idea that being mechanical and organized and having everything planned for is not necessarily a disadvantage.

If u thought that Sing N/Ps were juvenile, check out the Economist's city briefings!!!!U will be surprised that even the London publication takes note of it.
But of course (digressing a bit) neither u nor they take note of the fact that in India a lot of brain-dead people simply burn their household garbage (other commonly burnt stuff includes used rubber, dry leaves swept aside on roads) and this also produces a lot of carbon monoxide and its quite an irritant. As if we don’t have enough pollution on the roads, in the office ( e.g when boss lights his cigarette OR the office brain-dead uses flit or some other pesticide inside air-conditioned offices to “kill” cockroaches of all creatures. The cockroaches don’t die but the human beings sure do inhale those harmful pesticides. And then when people get cancer, they say “how me”?)

BTW, don’t u think that our very own TOI also manages to have gossipy stuff on the front page? (So does ET, but then I kind of like their catchy and creative report titles.) May be that is what sells fast and easy. Pray, y is that negative for a country?

And lastly, a chewing gum playing spoilsport? That was a pathetic ending to Singapore Sling -1.

Anonymous said...

Forgot to add, the Economist's city briefings (dated 11/Oct/06) talks about the Indonesian fire causing a haze in Singapore.

Nothing Spectacular said...

Whoa!! Dear anonymous, you sure have some strong views here!!
1) I didn't say reporting on the haze was improper. I think that is absolutely necessary.
2) Your words bring out a lot of inbuilt biases: "wicked Indian aayaah"? "brain-dead people"? Are you implying that Indian aayaahs are wicked and Singaporean are not?
3) I am sorry you do not share my passion for chewing gum. It is important to me - can't help it if you find it pathetic :-)
Relax and enjoy!!

Anonymous said...

Wow Vishesh !

Looks like you got urself an ardent admirer in anon :)))

But I am hurt ! I notice that you only respond to comments when they lash out against what you write..

Does that mean that us complaisant fans of your writing have to turn hostile in order to get some attention from you??

Disheartened Me

Nothing Spectacular said...

Dear Me,
Thanks for pointing that out. Had not realized it so far..
Will take care in the future :-) Thanks a million for the support!!

Anonymous said...

I think this anonymous guy\gal(??? )writing the long long comment is a poor frustrated Indian living in s`pore desparate to prove that his pathetic life is better than that of indians in 'that backward india'! there are many far too many like him\her who can see nothing good in india but close their eyes at anything bad elsewhere as long as it is 'abroad'!!! legacy of our colonial past maybe ...these people just try to imitate the english in their contempt for the 'kala bhukha nanga log'.I pity them and their hateful mentality.