Friday, September 25, 2009

I'm very pissed...

...with my bank (hypothetical situation). What do I do?

I ask the bank for compensation for my ire.

How much? One lakh? Ten lakhs? One crore? Hundred crore? One million crore?

Or a sextillion? (i.e one followed by 21 zeros)?

Not enough? How about ten sextillion?

Yeah! that sounds good! Ten sextillion then, is what this gentleman decided!

To call this absurd is akin to saying that Mallika Sherawat is ugly. i.e. highly understated!!!

When melancholy strikes...

...one remembers some old time poignant movies. E.g.

  1. Ijaazat: The story of a couple and how they discover each other when its too late. For the story click here
  2. Parinda: The story of two brothers and how fate intervenes to tear them apart. For story, click here
  3. One of the all time greats: The English Patient. Lyrical, forbidden love which is doomed. How humanity transcends nationality. Story here
  4. On the Waterfront. I could'a been a contender. I could'a been somebody! Story here

The common theme running in these classics is that of loneliness. Terrifying, slow loneliness. Attractive, alluring loneliness.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Very good interview

To complete the troika of bad, good and best, here is the final quote from the same website (but a different analyst):

Q: What do you do now for someone who has been left out in this rally for the past couple of months?

A: Conventional wisdom would suggest that as more and more people who have been left out get frustrated, they get sucked into the market and when the last of them gets sucked in that is when this market will break. Having said that, for me it has been a period of frustration, we are now less in cash than we were earlier much against my better judgement. We are clearly not looking at new ideas, at new stocks but adding a little bit to existing stocks in the midcap space which were looking cheap earlier, which are still looking cheap. My fundamental sense still tells me that there are too many dichotomies in this market, in this purely liquidity led. On the one hand you have consumer price inflation running away with itself but nobody believes that interest rates will go up. Commodity prices are heading higher but nobody believes that global economic recovery will suffer. The world has been through its worst economic crisis over the last twelve to fifteen months but everyone believes that the worst is over. The party is now well and truly on. I don’t think we are going to find too many people coming onto your channel and saying the next band is down. Everyone is saying that the next band is up and rightfully so because a lot of levels have been taken out. But this is a dichotomy. China is another huge imponderable here, three or four months ago, everyone was saying that Chinese growth will bailout the global economy but today China seems to be slowing down. But the view of the world has not changed. It is like one should not worry about China, everything will be fine. It is like the question you asked about the monsoon a little while earlier. The monsoon has not recovered but one should not worry, everything is fine, this market will go up. So that is the mood and it is the liquidity that is driving this mood and who are you or I to buck that trend.

And this is how it should be done...

This is a different guy on the same question:

Q: What about Tata Motors, can the current price be justified? Are you revising your price targets there?

A: Fundamentally, it’s difficult to recommend buying Tata Motors at these levels. First of all the biggest chunk of revenue at about 65-70% still comes from JLR which is geared to the US and Western European markets. That revenue and earnings stream remains quite unpredictable so there is this huge degree of variability in the earnings forecast for Tata Motors. With that kind of a risk I think, these valuations may not be justified at the current levels. In the auto’s side, there are far better opportunities which have a far steadier earnings stream and a lesser degree of risk associated with the business which one can buy. It’s difficult to recommend a risky earnings stream at high valuations at this point in time.

This is a decent answer - the guy talks about headwinds for the company, says that financial performance is difficult to predict, and that a risky earnings stream trading at high valuations is not to be recommended. Anyone who buys after this knows that she is taking a pure punt. This is what a good analyst should do.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

What is bullsh***ing 'analyst'

Just read this 'expert' on business channel CNBC's website. I quote:

Tata Motors a good buy?

Betadpur said, it was difficult to figure out a valuation for Tata Motors. “We have looked at the street estimates. It is all over the place as far as earnings per share (EPS) for 2011, our own numbers are around Rs 20 and we can give it a 30 multiple and that gives you Rs 600 - 30 multiple seems a little too much but that is where we are. If we say everything goes well for the stock, Jaguar-LandRover picks up by 2011, that is generating a lot of cash flow for the company and the EPS goes from our current estimates 20 to 30 and then you give it a 30 multiple, you get to Rs 900-1,000 target. That is what some people on the street are saying that Tata Motors can get to Rs 1,000. That is how we believe on the numbers but I don’t think everything is going to go positive for this company. “

What a jerk!!

1) He is not saying anything

2) He is not even providing any justification for his dumbass arguments - why should it trade at 30 times? What will make EPS increase 50%? Cash flow does not equate EPS. So what specifically will make EPS rise? What about the debt overhang? What about historical valuations?


Jokers like this really get my goat. And what business does CNBC have putting such brain-dead pretenders on air? The irony is that about 20,000 people would have read this and will call their brokers tomorrow with orders to buy Tata Motors, saying they have heard (on authority) that it will soon touch Rs 1000!!

They deserve the slaughtering they are going to get!


PS: I have nothing against Tata Motors. I think they make damn good SUVs!!

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Mo' on co-bro

Suggestions from Icon-o-blast:

Coveted brother
Colossal brother
Concocted brother
Convoluted brother
Constipated brother
Conundrum-like brother

Follow up from me:
Contrarian brother
Copulating brother